Pornotech Offers New Product

Although the American versions won't be out until 2008, Japanese consumers are already enjoying Pornotech's new Roboslut 3000. Pornotech has found a way for the age of technology to stretch (pun absolutely intended for you Magnum users!) to the new wave of pervert in an attempt to go way beyond surfing the internet for the latest in circus porn. That's right! For about the price of a hybrid car, Americans will soon be able to own their very own Roboslut 3000. Pornotech is taking advance orders on their website for custom-made versions of what they are calling "Artificial Fucktelligence." You can select the absolute dimensions of your computerized love machine, including skin color and body type, and you can even customize their voice to match that of your favorite celebrity. The dolls automatically adjust for a perfect fit for the consumer's anatomy and can be programmed to "share with a friend." The Roboslut 3000 also has a post-coital cuddle feature that can be toggled on and off based on your preference. Dolls are available in all nationalities and ages from 18-81. Also, only available in Amsterdam is a special model: the eight year-old Korean boy. It's expected to be a big underground hit with both members of the clergy and the U.S. Congress.